A woman who spent three hours a day, drawing pieces of her own hair, began to tear her eyelashes when she was only 8 years old. Megan Proser, 19, suffers from trichotillomania, also known as trichotomy, a mental disorder where the sufferers have an irresistible need to extract their hair.
During a "pulling attack", as Proser calls it, a tax and pet shop worker can easily create a balustrade patch with the size of her hand. Proxer, from New York Long Island, tried to regain control by shaving her head, but admitted that extracting hair still absorbs attention every day.
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"It spends every second of my day," she said. "I spend three hours a day trying to get my hair out, but I would not be surprised if it was more. I hope to get it under control, but I do not know if it will ever be able to stop it altogether."
When he began to extract eyelashes as a child, Prosser considered it the "desires" he was collecting.
"When you drop the eyelash on your cheek and you blow it out, you need to make a wish," she said. "I thought that I would have unlimited desires if I continued to pull them out. I did not realize that I could not stop it."
Tanja's mother Tanja, an assistant, was shocked when she noticed that her daughter's ears were gone.
"My mother astonished and said:" What are you doing? "Procer recalled." She tried to help me stop. We went to the doctor and I was diagnosed with trichotillomania. I went to therapy but did not work. I continued to pull my eyelashes, it was a way for me to control my body. "
"I never heard of trichotillomania before, and I was shocked and curious about it," said Tanja Prozer. "All together I thought it would be a temporary job, I did not realize it would take a long time."
At 12, Procer continued to crack his hair on his head.
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"My friend straightened my hair and I noticed a few small figures around my parting," she said. "I started pulling them out and I could not stop it. I extracted a significant amount of hair, more joints at once".
Soon, Prosser's head was covered with bald patches and she endured terrible comments at school.
"At school, people would say that I looked like a stranger, I pointed my cells and gave me strange fears," she said. "But after I explained the situation to them, they ceased to be vicious, curious and simply posed questions."
Eventually, Tanya Prozer took her daughter into a dressing room to put a weave, which prevented the situation.
"The weaving covered my entire head, so I could not get my hair out," said Proser. "Later I wore a weave like a wig with a string at the top, so I could not get my hair out."
But while Prosser was preparing to leave high school at the age of 18 and worried about her future, the disorder came back and soon she drew more hair than ever before.
"I started to get angry," she said. "I did not know what I wanted to do with my life, my boyfriend joined the army, my friends went to college and I was home alone, I went to college from the community, I felt like moving everyone, and I stayed here. to count, I went like crazy. "
"In the three-member community, we call them such attacks," she said. "I took out my hair for my eyebrows. I tried to move to pull my hair on my arms and legs, because it's much less noticeable, but it does not work for me, I do not get the same urge to get that hair out. Sometimes I took out some hair and flushed it through the toilet because I did not want people to see it in the trash. "
She hid hair loss by shooting her powder cells designed for women by hiding gray hair. She wore false eyelashes to hide her eyes without hands.
While trichotillomania is considered by some medical professionals to be a form of self-harm, Prosser compared her impetus to the desire to scratch her itching.
"It's almost like a bad scratch that I have to scratch," she said. "It's a strange kind of sensation, I feel it will not disappear if I do not get all the hair out of that area, not self-harm, it's a lack of control." I feel relief and, although it's sometimes unpleasant, it never hurts. "
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In January she shaved her head in an effort to force herself to stop pulling.
"I wanted to shave my head from high school, but I was worried about what my classmates would say," she said.
But Procer once again pulls her hair and cares she will never stop.
"I hope that I will eventually stop, but I do not know how likely that is," she said. "I do not know if I will ever stop".
Proser, who shares her trichotillomania experience under her name on YouTube, decided to speak out about her disorder to encourage other sufferers to trust in friends and family.
"Many people who have that are really scared to tell others about their hair," she said. "My family knew about my trichotillomania, but keeping my confidentiality from my friends made me feel worse. After telling people about it, I wanted to stop, so those people could see that I was progressing. It helps you tell people for that, encourages you to stop. "